“Welcome to Baltimore. Enjoy What’s Left of Your Week.”

Said the pilot, after he landed the plane — and then immediately forgot what he was supposed to do next. (HINT: pull up to the gate, allow passengers to disembark.)

By the way, this was only the first leg of our trip: our final destination was Providence.

(Un)Fortunately (?), we had a lengthy layover, so sitting on the tarmac for 25 minutes? No big deal. I passed the time by coloring in all the states I’ve visited on the map printed on my complimentary beverage napkin.

"places i've been"

It makes me a little sad to realize that I’ve never been to California, and even sadder to admit that I *have* been to Michigan*

Anyway, now I am in Rhode Island, home of the Big Blue Bug. No, really:


Other things, too. But this was the one that really stood out in my jet-lagged mind. And can you blame me?

Technically, we are on vacation. I say ‘technically” because I had to take several vacation days in order to go on this trip, which involves a wedding and my in-laws. As a result, my feelings about this “vacation” are best summarized by the following image:


Now imagine the sound that this creature would make, were it to come to life and find itself trapped in some stranger’s living room. Not-so-coincidentally, that sound is more or less the exact late-night voice mail message I left for my therapist.


*Specifically Detroit, for an entire night, thanks to a different airline, which is terrible at scheduling connections for international flights.
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One thought on ““Welcome to Baltimore. Enjoy What’s Left of Your Week.”

  1. JennyOH says:

    See, I saw that napkin and thought it was some sort of joke like that old “I flew to New York, my bags took a lovely vacation to LA, Chicago, and Detroit” or however it goes.

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