Lost Lunch

The Good: My workplace FINALLY has a crackerjack admin.

The Bad: When it comes to the breakroom fridge, she takes no prisoners.

The Ugly: During her weekly (!) 2 pm (!!) fridge purge, she threw away my lunch (!!!)

And that’s how I didn’t get to eat today.

Here’s what I missed: day 3 or 4 (I’ve lost count) of leftover vegetarian chili in a wrap.

For those interested in our idiot-proof vegetarian chili recipe — and for whatever reason there seem to be a fair number of masochistic people who are interested in our idiot-proof vegetarian recipes — here it is:

1. Soak dry beans in bowl in fridge (they don’t actually need to be refrigerated, but our household is full of furry machines of destruction adorable pets); I used what I found in the cabinet: black beans, red kidney beans, and black-eyed peas.

2. Add beans to crockpot with one (1) jar store brand salsa — heat level is cook’s choice.

3. Chop and saute every vegetable you can get your hands on: in this case, I used onions, peppers, garlic, carrots, turnips (sigh), and rutabaga (grumble)*

4. Dump into crockpot, turn on HIGH.

Actually, it’s entirely possible that your crockpot is better than ours, which is…well, “vintage,” if you’re feeling charitable; “old as hell” if you’re not. If so, then you may have a choice of settings beyond “high” and “off” (“low” stopped working a long time ago, and is now the same as “off.”)

Just make sure it’s turned on, I guess. Since you’re cooking vegetable matter for 8 hours or so, you almost don’t have to worry about temperature.

5. Whenever you get home from work, eat the chili. It’s good with rice, if you’re feeling ambitious. It’s also fine on its own. If you’re some kind of domestic f*cking god(dess), you can even add toppings — diced red onion, cheese, avocado, cilantro, whatever you like.

What’s nice about this recipe is that, unless you’re one of those Quiverfull** families, the leftovers will feed you and yours for about a week. We tend to wrap ours in flour tortillas and encase in aluminum foil, because they stack up neatly in the fridge and heat up well in toaster ovens.

At least, they do if the office admin doesn’t get to them first.

*sometimes called swede, but really just another fancy word for “turnip”
**Spellcheck actually recognizes this term, which suggests that my fear that we’ll all be Duggars within 3 generations is well-founded.
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